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Sunday, February 11, 2007

Getting Along


I have said that I do not like conflict. It is not that I am unwilling to stand-up for myself in an actual physical fight. It is not that I am unwilling to stand my ground in "discussing" my philosophies on life, love, and religion. It's the yelling, profanity, and uncontrolled emotions that others bring to the "discussion" that offend and disappoint me.

I don't "argue" about my faith, my politics, nor my views about life in general. Arguments are pointless for it seems that one or both sides want to claim some sort of "victory". My life and whatever "wisdom" I embrace are just that --- mine. If I choose to have a more mature or fuller expression of my viewpoints I will do so after careful consideration and not when someone attempts to jam their religion or beliefs down my throat.

I am particularly dismayed when I witness another family's interactions that end with profanity and the slamming of doors. I witnessed such a spectacle last night. And, to be honest, I came home, bought some beer and drank..... I generally do not drink, nor do I keep any alcohol in my home. Last night was the rare exception. Yes, it wasn't very healthy considering all the meds I must take.

I cannot recall any time when any one in my family had such an argument. We seem particularly blessed in that we love each other and get along fairly well. If we do have some tiff it doesn't last very long and is soon forgotten. And, for certain we never dredge up any past disappointment and throw it in the faces of our siblings.

As the anniversary of my father's death is at hand, I cannot help but remember how my family gave of themselves without reservation to care for Dad in his final year of life. We had great parents that taught us to be strong, independent, and caring. My father gave up his day's off from work to help neighbors, friends, and our extended family repair this or install that. Both Mom and Dad were generous and selfless when called upon to help a "neighbor".

We learned from their examples and we all have gentle spirits that call us to help others when we can.

I couldn't help last night. The escalating argument reached a flash point so very quickly. How very very sad.

Today, I am grateful for a loving God and my family that has been blessed by Him. And, my mood? I'm just hunky dory. The sun is shining and I know that my Redeemer lives!

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2 comments:

Bleeding Heart said...

Sorry about your Dad...

I, too don't like confrontation...I don't like arguing or bickering at anyone about anything.

However, I like a good debate if done with kindness:)

I am so emotionally sensitive and I could get very defensive if someone bothered me enough.:)

When I see people fight or aruge, I don't like it either..

But the funny thing is..no one is perfect and when I argue with my hubby or yell at my kids...it is true what they say:

"You should see yourself." "You should hear yourself."

Sometimes I wonder if I sound or look like those "other" people...

It is scary...

But all in all...I can identify with this post and I totally get it:)

Jon said...

That has to hurt, to see family torn up like that.

I live for a good discussion. But so many people hold their views and beliefs so close to their core they just aren't capable of discussing them on a rational, respectful level. Once the first personal attack comes out in a discussion you might as well walk away, it's over.